I am the furthest thing from a morning person. Every morning, I hit snooze at least four times, throw the cat on the floor about twice that, and finally stumble blindly to my Mr. Coffee rather than actually putting on my glasses and you know, seeing clearly. By the time I actually get out the door it's...later than it should be.
Lately, there have been a lot of articles rotating around the internet about great morning traditions- most that I can't get a third of the way through without scoffing (OIL PULLING? COME ON, PEOPLE- I do not have time for these shenanigans). Thought Catalog posted a somewhat redeeming article about Morning Rituals that I thought could be valuable. Without further adieu, said article in full, and my comments on the article.
1. Take Epsom salt baths. So I get what you're trying to do here, because an Epsom salt bath is pretty leisurely and wonderful. I personally LOVE a bath, complete with music and books and/or Netflix (also a cat, trying to climb in the water because SOMEONE doesn't seem to understand that cats aren't supposed to like swimming). But at 7 in the morning? No. Plus, I don't know about y'all, but submerging myself in hot water makes me want to go directly to sleep, the opposite of the desired result here.
My take? Agreed, but do it the night before, not the morning of.
2. Set Intentions. I think we all know by now that I agree with this 100%. My yoga mat has "Set your intention" embedded on the front so when I'm suffering through hour two of hot flow I can remember exactly why I thought this was a good idea. I understand, not everyone wants to run around bowing and namaste-ing, but setting an intention really is helpful for those moments when you want to hurl something across the room/glare at an unsuspecting child/ cut someone off in traffic, etc. I'm not going to tell you what my intentions are, because those are private and this is the internet OKAY? But remember: the light within me, honors the light within you. And if your intention was to let your peace inundate those around you, that might help you get excited for the coming day, or at least stop you from lecturing your co-workers on the necessity of recycling at 2pm when you're just really, really, hangry.
My take? Absofreakingloutley.
3. Put on something warm as soon as you get up. I like the idea behind this, however, I live in Atlanta. And I haaaaaate being hot. Also, I had an incident in high school where i put on a sweatshirt when I woke up because it's freezing in Idaho, and I forgot to put real clothes on, and running around high school in a hoodie and no bra when you're 16 is awkward at best. I may or may not have forced my best friend to give me her gross gym sports bra. It's been a decade, I'm still traumatized. For Lauren's wedding, all of the bridesmaids got kimono robes that are super thin and amazing, and I spend a sickening amount of time in mine. Also, because LAUREN COME BACK TO ME.
My take? Unnecessary. I live alone, and have no qualms with spending my mornings in nothing but socks.
Photo Credit: Linda Montero
4. Rather than meditate, learn to just sit quietly for a few minutes. I downloaded an app on meditation once- it's seven minutes of meditation. I figured, anyone can do anything for seven minutes, how hard can it be? The answer is impossible. Sitting quietly is not something I can do. The cat would be all up in my grill, demanding treats/love/scratching me. Also, as nice as peacefulness and stillness are in the morning, I need something to blast me out of bed. Yep. Much better.
My take? If "sitting quietly"= dancing around my studio/singing in the shower/moonwalking, then yes.
5. Read a book- not the newspaper, and not your Twitter feed. Firstly, how will I know what's happening in the world if I don't check Twitter first thing in the AM? And then again at the office? And then an hour later? Oh...I see what you're getting at. I would love to be all for this, but when I'm reading a good book (I'm currently reading The Fault In Our Stars, because I jumped on that bandwagon) there's no way I'm putting it down to go to work. This is my number one complaint about Atlanta, in case you didn't already know (you did, I talk about it all the time). If I could take a bus/train to work, then I'd get in much more reading.
My take? If you can take public transit DO IT. It's a great way to calm your mind down before you start a crazy day at the office. If you have to drive, see above (Miley).
6. Make a list of your most basic tasks and cross them off the list as you do them. This one seems ridiculous to me. It actually says "get up", "brush your teeth", etc. Excuse me while I refer to #1...AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT. If you don't remember how to brush your teeth in your adult years, you should not be reading this blog or having access to the internet in general. As any Type A person is wont to do, though, I make daily lists, so I get the idea here.
My take? Do it at night, before you leave the office. When you come in and have a handy dandy list of what needs to happen immediately, you can go through those robotic functions until caffeine works its' magic.
(sidenote- Ryan Lange...is this your hand? Are you seriously showing up on the first page of Google Image search? Or do you just have a doppleganger/tattoo copier?)
7. Keep your phone on the other side of the room when you go to sleep.
So that's my take.
8. Make sure your sleep schedule matches your circadian rhythm. You know those times where you wake up, and even if you got less sleep than usual you feel great? That happens because you woke up at the perfect part of your sleep rhythm cycle. There is a really great app for this called Sleep Cycle, and it's actually pretty amazing. You set an ideal time to wake up, and your phone alarm will go off within 15 minutes of that time, when you're in the most prime part of your sleep schedule to wake up. You also can see a handy chart of how much or little tossing and turning you did the night before. Of course, this would require you to NOT have your phone across the room (ahem #7), but the science behind this is real.
My take? It's tricky, but if you can maneuver it, it's definitely worthwhile.
9. Envision. My Grandmother always says that you should visualize yourself whenever you want something, because it's more likely to happen that way. I have been visualizing myself with Adam Brody for about a decade now and it doesn't seem to be working out, but I am only 26, so there's still time for us.
My take? Lying in bed and imaging how that meeting will go, how a conversation you've been dreading will turn out okay, or just giving yourself a general positive outlook is a great plan.
10. Stretch in bed. Duh.
My take? Stretching is the single greatest thing you can do. But not just in the morning, all throughout the day.
11. If you're going to wake up early for something, make it something you can look forward to. The article recommends a massage which, where are you finding places to do this at 6am? But a morning blowout, if I could afford such a thing, would get me out of bed early on the reg.
My take? Once again, getting up for 6am yoga is pretty great, but if you run, walk your pet, go to Starbucks, whatever. Having a reason to get up besides dragging yourself to work is awesome.
12. Text someone good morning. As if I don't snapchat a picture of myself looking incredible from sleep to everyone I know in the morning. Please.
My take? Again, duh. But also, Snapchat is a much nicer way to do this because most of my friends live a time zone or three away and a 3am text wouldn't be very nice...
13.TREAT Yo' self. I suppose I do this to some extent already, but usually my plans are made at least a day in advance. That way, when I wake up in the morning I remember, "Hey, Carlie & Bethany and getting margaritas/going to ghostride the whip/hit up the pool after work today!" It's a solid way to propel yourself through a long day.
My take? Life isn't worth living without SOMETHING to look forward to- big events like travel, or even something small like having a mini Revenge catch-up marathon. Which is also why I WILL get stabby with you if you Atzman* my plans.
*slang for flake
14. Respect your limitations. There are some humans who will never be able to get up before sunrise and run six miles (hand raise). But there is something to be said for pushing yourself within reason. We're all creatures of habit. If you know that eating a full breakfast before work makes your day run smoother, DO IT. Racing to work after hitting snooze a gazillion times is not fulfilling, and just creates unnecessary stress. Trust me, I'm an expert in this. Even for me, the most non-morning person of all time, there are few things more beautiful than a silent city. Before the cars start honking and the lines build up at the coffee shop, and the sun starts to rise, and you think to yourself, "maybe I can like this city, after all".
What about you? What makes you get out of bed every day? I need all the advice I can get, so holler at your girl in the comments.
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